Rewritten Headlines: Kevorkian to Jersey Shore
on June 4, 2011 at 12:01 amHey bros!
Time to check the news. As always, I hate the news because it takes too damned long to tell me things. I say, why not let the headline give it away.
Real: “Dr. Death” Jack Kevorkian Dies
Rewritten: Media Finally Ends Use of Nice Doctor’s Grim Nickname
Real: John Edwards denies Federal Charges
Rewritten: Man Who Listened to Penis Still in Trouble
Real: Dow Falls in Longest Slump Since 2004 Amid Concerns About Economy
Rewritten: Rich Guys Preparing to Ask for New Bailout
Real: Yemen’s President Wounded but Defiant
Rewritten: Reporters Find One Guy That Won’t Out Live Gadaffi
Real: Judge urges NFL and players to reach agreement
Rewritten: Judge tells millionaires to fix their own problems
Real: Jersey Shore Season Four Debuts August 4
Rewritten: Millions Wish That Apocalypse Happens Before August