Twitter in Focus: Adam Goldberg
on August 27, 2014 at 1:35 amHey Bros!
Welcome to Twitter in Focus where media comes to die! Today’s contestant is Adam Goldberg, the Hebrew Hammer! Plus that hitman that got killed in Fargo. Let’s see what he’s tweeting.
August 24th: “Hmmmm Jumbo’s Clown Room tonight or the VMAs?”
Strippers or the VMA’s? Either way, plenty of single moms.
August 24th: “So much feminism on the VMAs. You’ve cum a long way baby.”
Dammit. Should’ve hit the Clown Room.
August 25th: “#emmys2014 spared no expense. http://instagram.com/p/sI2-EljrZP/”
Two cups? How are you going to play beer pong with Aaron Paul using that?
August 25th: “#Emmys update. Spent over $40 bucks on concessions. #class ”
Well, at least you can run anyone’s credit card whenever you want.
August 25th: “Not nominated. Just agoraphobic. #emmys ”
Imagine if you had Vine video technology when you were a kid. The Goldbergs would be completely different and only five minutes an episode.”
August 25th: “I think I’m the only non-seat warmer in my row at the #Emmys.”
Did everyone send their robot double? It’s all the rage in L.A. now.
August 25th: “I already have to pee. #Emmys”
Well, that will warm the seat for a while.
August 25th: “I didn’t turn my phone off. #Emmys”
Goldberg don’t give a fuck!
August 25th: “If I meet @lenadunham tonight I’m gonna ask her how much more dark and asymmetrical a brother has to be to land a role on her show. #emmys”
You gotta network at these things.
August 25th: “The bad news is the water costs $4. The good news is you can’t bring it in the theater. #Emmys”
So, what, you chug it and then have to pee during Best Support Actress or something?
August 25th: “Fuck this, out of here. #Emmys”
Sounds like a nightmare. When does the banging of starlets happen? I thought this was show business, God dammit!
August 25th: “Smuggled. It’s just an honor to be hydrated. #Emmys ”
At that price, it’s almost a felony to steal that water bottle.
August 25th: “Okay now I really am leaving. #Emmys”
Get out before the musical number. No, wait. It’s Weird Al. Stay.
August 25th: “Shit. Can’t complain now. #Emmys”
Wait, did you get a nom? I’d nominate you for the Goldbergs. It’s a pretty good show, bro.
August 25th: “Christ the hypoglycemia. #Emmys”
Yeah, that’s the “in” condition in Hollywood now.
August 25th: “Having difficulty resisting urge to noogie @louisck and insist we’ve worked together until he awkwardly concedes out of politeness. #Emmys”
That would probably give him a good 10 minutes of stand up. I call it a win-win.
August 26th: “#Emmys governor’s ball OR Silverstein bar mitzvah? ”
Difficult to tell. There’s going to be a lot of Jewish people at all three.
Okay, let’s rate Adam’s tweets. Gotta love this behind-the-scenes look at the Emmys. I give him a 10 for Mustness, a 10 for Style and a 10 for Insanity. That’s the highest score ever for this column. Congrats on the perfect 10, Adam. Nice tweeting.
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