Ten Things You Shouldn’t Do If You’re Mistaken For Dead
on November 15, 2014 at 12:01 am
You can still be mistaken for dead. So remember, go out in a blaze of glory so there is absolutely no chance of revival. But if you don’t, remember these ten things not to do if you’re mistaken for dead.
1. Don’t rise up and moan, “Brains! Brains!”
2. Don’t quietly attempt to slip away to plot revenge against those that put you in the funeral.
3. Don’t assume you’re a ghost and walk into traffic thinking the cars will pass through you.
4. Don’t look for this lady.
5. Don’t assume it’s the future and start talking to a disembodied computer.
6. Don’t knock out the funeral director and make him take your place.
7. Don’t assume you now need blood to survive.
8. Don’t reason that since you didn’t die, you’re the Highlander.
9. Don’t assume the rules of death no longer apply.
10. Don’t roll over and go back to sleep in the coffin.
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