Rewritten Headlines: Cops to Bird Flu
on December 5, 2014 at 12:01 amGovernment to Pretend to Do Something
State Governor Already Ignoring State
U.S. to Ignore This Part of the Middle East
Planet of the Apes One Step Closer
Jello Pudding Award Revoke Probably Next Step
Other Foods Soon to be Overpriced for Hipsters
Nerds Living in Other Countries
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