Jan03
Ten Things I Expect McDonald’s to Do to Hold Onto Customers
on January 3, 2015 at 12:01 am
I used to eat at McDonald’s all the time. Now Mickey Dee’s wants us back. Here’s ten ways I think they’ll try to lure us fat fucks back in.
1. Deep fry all McDonald’s furniture.
2. Force the Hamburglar to make restitution to all his previous victims.
3. Introduce the new “Nicotine-Wich”
4. Replace McDonald’s Playgrounds with McDonald’s Crossfit Training Centers
5. Print a picture of a naked lady inside the bottom of every Big Mac box.
6. Shamrock Shakes every day!
7. On-site defibrillators available to all customers for free.
8. Run drive-thru special where customers get to fill their trunks with fries.
9. Three words: Chicken McNugget Launcher
10. Sexy new Grimace!
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