Twitter in Focus: Theodus Crane
on March 18, 2015 at 12:01 amHey Bros!
Welcome to Twitter in Focus where media comes to die! Today’s contestant is Big Tiny from the Walking Dead, Theodus Crane! Let’s see what he’s tweeting.
March 11th: “Frankenstein Created Bikers : A 35mm Feature Film is popular on @Kickstarter! http://kck.st/1EbjpQB ”
Hmm, that sounds pretty watchable for at least the first act.
March 11th: “Turkey bacon is nothing but a lie…”
Finally, someone speaks the truth on Twitter!
March 12th: “I’m thinking of a number… 1- 1,000,000,000 Go!”
467,235?
March 12th: “What has nine legs, seven arms, and two heads? I don’t know, either. That’s why I’m asking.”
There’s a lot of tough questions on this Twitter.
March 12th: “Fun Fact: If you add me to a Group DM… I legally have to unfollow you.”
He’s right. We all have to live under the same law or there will be chaos and spam.
March 13th: “It’s 2015… I thought we’d be able to roll in a cloud of puppies by now…”
Well, the problem is, puppies don’t evaporate at the temperature scientists initially thought. But they’re working on it.
March 13th: “How much longer until quitting time?”
March 13th: “”I want a purple cat… Make it happen internet!
March 14th: “I’m going, going, back, back to Cali, Cali….”
March 15th: “Sometimes I think about all the sandwiches that I didn’t eat…and that makes me sad…”
I’m so fat, I’m sad for you.
March 16th: “How many photoshopped “Mullet Dicks” have you received so far? @nerdist”
I’m afraid to Google that to find out what it is.
March 16th: “I’m still waiting for Morgan Freeman to narrate my life.”
“I must admit I didn’t think much of Theodus’s tweets first time I read them; looked like he wanted to read them in Morgan Freeman’s voice. But as Morgan Freeman always said, you’d better get tweeting or your better get dying.”
March 16th: “Happy Monday y’all! #CraneGang ”
I’m assuming you don’t mean this.
17 hours ago: “Are you asleep twitter? Or are you just playing possum?”
Watch out. That’s when the tweets are meanest. Just when Twitter wakes up.
15 hours ago: “Out of my way, sober people. I don’t need that kind of negativity in my life.”
Good call. The bros would agree.
Okay, let’s rate Theodus’s tweets. He’s out there plugging away, but not with too many plugs. Tons of fun. Why didn’t the Walking Dead keep this guy around? I give him a 9 for Mustness, a 9 for Style and a 9 for Insanity. Straight up 9. Follow Theodus.
And if you have a suggestion for Twitter in Focus, email me here.
