Twitter in Focus: Andrew Santino
on April 27, 2016 at 12:01 amHey Bros!
Welcome to Twitter in Focus where media comes to die! Today’s contestant is comedian Andrew Santino. Let’s see what he’s tweeting.
March 28th: “Young Metro…Goldwyn-Mayer pic.twitter.com/I9FGLNzg1O”
Obligatory cat tweet. Everybody gets one.
March 30th: “Knock, knock Who’s there? It’s me, Hollywood Well! Come on in, my place is a mess, but that’s why you’re here right?!?”
Every time Hollywood comes to my door, it just takes the welcome mat and leaves.
April 1st: “#TGIF pic.twitter.com/hkybMHhVrr”
Ha. Nice!
April 13th: “Do us all a favor, if your Snapchat name is honeybunny143 at least put your picture on your icon so we know who the fuck you are”
But I want all my ass pics to be anonymous.
April 14th: “Umm…DISMISS pic.twitter.com/rkt5yoo2Vk”
C’mon, I’m sure Amber had an important reason for this.
April 14th: “So…this is a racist emoji right??? ”
Only if it’s followed by a tiny little white hood.
April 15th: “Tonight at @TheComedyStore at 10pm my arch nemesis Andrew Santo will be performing. Come watch me ridicule him.pic.twitter.com/MznzOkAJWK”
Hey, it’s a comedy club. They only get so many letters. How do you think Eugene Mirman feels when they run out of E’s?!
April 15th: “Rap Names Drake = Aubrey, Common = Lonnie, Future = Nayvadius, Fetty Wap = Willie, A$ap Ferg = Darold, Riff Raff = Horst, G-Eazy = Gerald #LOL”
And Ice-T equals Tracy. Anyway you slice it, these guys changed their names for a reason.
April 16th: “BOTH THESE DUDES JUST SAW THE SCORE #WTAFpic.twitter.com/NTZyrmRgFP”
Sports can be sad.
April 19th: “I’m voting for Ted Cruz because he looks like tapioca pudding Also, Bernie Sanders is a joke and Hillary is a coffee table”
Well, at least you thought it through.
April 19th: “Welcome to Los Angeles, may I see your shitty tattoo? Great! Come on in!”
Dammit! A new requirement? Thanks a lot, TSA!
April 21st: “My only wish is that everyone posts a picture of prince on Instagram today”
I don’t get why people are making such a big deal about the royal family this week.
April 23rd: “The only way to watch @NHLBlackhawkspic.twitter.com/1iVVgVDGeN”
Yeah, without those cabinets, you might think you weren’t in a basement watching Canadians beat each other.
April 25th: “One day I’m going to hit a speed bump while chugging this massive bottle of Pellegrino and it’s going to knock out my front teeth #cantwait“
Preemptively remove the teeth. Problem solved.
Okay, let’s rate Andrew’s tweets. Strange, minimum plugs, definitely a mix of material and random stuff. I give Andrew an 8 for Style, an 8 for Mustness and a 9 for Insanity. That’s an overall score of 8.3. Follow Andrew.
And if you have a suggestion for Twitter in Focus, email me here.