Ira’s Drunken Recipes: Chocolate Cake
on May 22, 2017 at 1:11 amIngredients: Butter, flour, sugar, cocoa powder, baking soda, baking powder, salt, 4 large eggs, buttermilk, warm water, vegetable oil, vanilla extra, smart phone, health insurance card, 14 beers.
Step 1: Drink 14 beers at a fraternity mixer.
Step 2: Stagger into frat house kitchen looking for cake.
Step 3: Decide to make cake, looking up Internet recipe on smart phone.
Step 4: Mix all ingredients at once, failing to take into account amounts.
Step 5: Look for spoon to mix ingredients.
Step 6: Decide that there might be a wooden spoon in the basement.
Step 7: Fall down basement steps with bowl of ingredients, pass out.
Step 8: Wake up cake with chocolate cake ingredients.
Step 9: Realize that your broke your wrist during fall.
Step 10: Go to hospital emergency room, use health insurance card.
Step 11: Sober up during resetting of bones.
Step 12: Buy chocolate cake in hospital vending machine.