Ten Things I Expect to Buy If I Win the Lottery
on January 16, 2016 at 12:01 amAll this lottery talk got me to thinkin’ and buying tickets. What would I do with the money? Buy some pretty ridiculous shit!
- Buy the high toilet from Tosh.0: This makes total sense to me.
- A bulletproof car: There are going to be jealous people out there with guns.
- The most expensive bagel in the world: I have no justification, I just want this.
- A private concert from Beyoncé: Most so I could boo her.
- Pay people I don’t like to do really stupid things on camera.
- You know I love sushi, so I will be eating here a lot.
- Plus I’ll fly to eat here.
- I don’t want an expensive car, I’d rather have this weird grass car: So my gardener would have to attend to my car first and foremost.
- Buy five million tickets and win again.
- I will own a volcano. Has to happen.