Dec28

Twitter in Focus: Megan Mullally

by tonyd on December 28, 2016 at 12:01 am

Hey Bros!

Welcome to Twitter in Focus where media comes to die!  Today’s contestant is Megan Mullally, hilarious actress and wife of Nick Offerman.  Let’s see what she’s tweeting.

@MeganOMullally

December 19th:  “more premiere ” https://twitter.com/MeganOMullally/status/810717138117742597

Looks fancy.

December 19th:  “the first in my series: The Men of ? Part One: here we have the very sultry … right, ladies?”

You could start a calendar.

December 20th:  “this is my favorite thing I’ve done in a while ”

You’re toying with Drew’s heart!

December 20th: “The Men of Part Two: today’s entry the entrancing another slam dunk, if I’m not mistaken, gals”

Bryan is just in everything now.

December 20th: “getting the gangbang back together tonight ”

Aw, that’s fun.

December 21st:  “Part Three of my series: The (Wo)Men of Why Him? I give you , a bunny who turned into a girl ”

Looks like it’s going to be a good movie.

December 22nd:  “pig out on soup much, ? (he carved these utensils for me)”

Now you can go to the Renaissance Faire.

December 22nd:  “I had the MOST FUN OF ANYTHING EVER with today at 2pm ”

Let the promotional tour begin!

December 22nd:  “Oy. What can you do but laugh? But thanks for having my back ! ”

Megan’s so happy and positive.

December 22nd:  “sub-category: The Boys of featuring teen heartthrob A little something for the tweens”

Lotsa people in that movie.

December 23rd:  “the last in my acclaimed series, The Men of : Every girl & boy’s dream . You’re welcome. opens TODAY!!”

Totally want to see this movie.  It’s a solid premise.

19 hours ago:  “we did it!! we took my 95-yr-old mom to see this afternoon in Oklahoma City. here she is with all her pals. thank you

Awww, that’s so sweet.

Okay, let’s rate Megan’s tweets.  Lots of behind-the-scenes, which I like.  Lots of photos.  Very positive.  I give Megan a 7 for Insanity, an 8 for Mustness and a 10 for Style.  That’s an overall score of 8.3, but I’m rounding it up to 9 because she’s married to Nick Offerman.

And if you have a suggestion for Twitter in Focus, email me here.

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Dec26

Binge Watch: Hotel Impossible

by tonyd on December 26, 2016 at 12:01 am

So the Missus and I watch Hotel Impossible on the Travel Channel. Normally, I cannot tolerate these redecoration shows. The home owners talk endlessly about their stupid house and how they want to live. It makes me want to jump out a window.

However, when Anthony Melchiorri talks about it, it’s different. It’s his job. He’s not talking like some spoiled American idiot with too much money to spend on their house. Lots of times, the owners are just clueless. Sometimes, they actually have very nice hotels but are just terrible managers and marketers.

Anyhow, it’s a reality show with a good story, not unlike Restaurant Impossible. The Travel Channel’s “seasons” aren’t exactly easy to figure out. I just check the on-Demand menu and eventually the show pops up with “Current Season”. Guess they don’t have a lot of money to advertise. The show is good though. Unfortunately, they just added “Hotel Impossible Showdown” turning into a competition between hotel people. That, I don’t want to see. That seems contrived and annoying. Melchiorri’s rants seem very genuine and he seems to actually help people.

So if you’re looking for something to watch that’s about an hour, Hotel Impossible is a fun show that always ends in a nice clean hotel room. I give the show 7 out of 10 keggers.

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Dec25

Your Christmas Fratoscope

by tonyd on December 25, 2016 at 12:01 am

FratoScopeHeader

If your birthday is this week:  Santa invoices you for making him also delivery your birthday gifts.

Aries:  An elf will wake you up at 3 am and beg you to hide him from his cruel task master, Santa.

Taurus:  A close friend will drink over nogged egg nog, but fortunately you’ll get them to nutmeg in time.

Gemini:  Your pyramid scheme will be revealed and several angry mummies will attempt to sue.

Lemini:  Your stocking are not hung by the chimney with care, so they fall into the fire.

Cancer:  Your Secret Santa will insist on keeping you under surveillance throughout 2017.

Leo:  The stars say, Jesus will not bring you pizza no matter how much you pray.

Virgo:  You’ll accidentally donate all your prank gifts to “Toys for Tots”.

Libra:  This year, you’ll notice Santa’s lap is awfully damp.

Scorpio:  You’ll make sweet love to an elf in the dark, but realize later it’s just lawn decoration.

Sagittarius:  Your feast of the seven fishes is only approved by six of the seven fish you invite.

Capricorn:  You’ll finally bribe your way off the Naughty list.

Aquarius:  Your gingerbread men will demand you bake gingerbread strippers.

Pisces:  You’ll get your Christmas wish early as the election of 2016 finally fucking ends.

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Dec24

Ten Things You Shouldn’t Do on Christmas Day

by tonyd on December 24, 2016 at 12:01 am

  1.  Take the Christmas decorations down.
  2.  Open your gifts in the nude.
  3.  Loudly invite everyone in a church to come to your house to watch football.
  4.  Dress as Santa and run through the streets screaming, “I’m not finished!  I’m not finished!”
  5.  Hold the opening day of your brand new Haunted House.
  6.  Leave message on store voice mails demanding to know why they’re not open today.
  7.  Start angry political arguments on Facebook in the comments section of someone’s family Christmas picture.
  8.  Show everyone your largest poop as part of a “group present”.
  9.  Go caroling using nothing but Death Metal songs.
  10.  Insist everyone participate in your Easter Egg Hunt.
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