Tony D with a story about a sponsor.
Tony D with a story about a sponsor.
Hey Bros!
Welcome to Twitter in Focus where media comes to die. Today’s contestant is an It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia alumn, Kaitlin Olson, AKA: Sweet Dee. She’s funny on the show, let’s check out her tweets.
February 2nd: “New Unsupervised on tonight! #UnsupervisedFX”
An awesome show if you haven’t caught. Kaitlin voices Carol, the stepmom that always gets high.
February 2nd: “Holy shit! Troops! Did you even know about this?? Was it all worth it, or WHAT!? http://pic.twitter.com/2jVrA1vH”
I’m guessing only some of the troops are really going to want that.
February 13th: “When did Ted Danson join our cast?@ponnyc: @ the Philly tattoo convention this week end and I bought this sunny art: http://lockerz.com/s/183420675”
Zing!
February 24th: “More rocket tits on #UnsupervisedFX tonight.”
So far, I think my favorite episode is the one where Joel thinks his brother is gay.
March 11th: “I know, I’m sorry. Just 9 months pregnant. Very similar. @PhDHoffmann: @kaitlin_olson I was worried you died. You need to tweet more.”
Can’t tweet a lot during pregnancy. Or your baby will grow up only saying things in under 140 characters.
March 26th: “Aww! Thank you! @cerisehorne: @kaitlin_olson took a dump in my purse today….thought of you!”
Classic sunny episode. Who Pooped the Bed?
March 26th: “You should get a load of me real-vomiting @innuendo141: @kaitlin_olson there is something unsettlingly sexy about the way you dry-vomit.”
That kind of reminds me that Kaitlin had a reoccurring role on Curb Your Enthusiasm. Now THAT would be an interesting crossover.
March 27th: “Baby due in 5 days, my son has a bad cold, I’m on crutches and I just got a piece of quinoa in my eyeball. Cut the shit, God.”
Wow, that sounded like such a Sweet Dee line.
March 30th: “No, it’s me @Wendinator3300: I’m upset that for these new Mio energy commercials theres 1 w/an ostrich and @kaitlin_olson isn’t playing her.”
Now why isn’t there an IMDB for commercials?
March 30th: “Aww..that would have been nice. @blackjeebus: @kaitlin_olson I want to be the first black man in ur butthole.”
Damn. The IASIP fans don’t pull any punches. Or have any tact apparently.
April 9th: “Leo Grey McElhenney..born April 5th after 23 very very long hours. We’re in love. http://pic.twitter.com/bgv0ouKb”
Awww.
April 18th: “Brothers… http://pic.twitter.com/Bnqz3fjk”
Born into a show business family. I give it two years before they both have movie deals.
April 29th: “The word “epic” has worn out its welcome.”
And somehow “awesome” has not.
May 11th: “I get that he’s doing a Dave Matthews thing, but I sure would like to hump that Phillip Phillips.”
But like Dave Matthews, he’d probably get really annoying after awhile.
May 11th: “If you have kids who are picky eaters, go download my friend’s new app LaLa Lunchbox on iTunes…it’s only 2 dollars, don’t be an asshole.”
My brother was a picky eater and now his kids are. Justice.
May 13th: “Happy Mother’s day @mamamelinda ..thank you for teaching me patience, selflessness, and live without limits. I owe it all to you. Xx”
Wow, Kaitlin goes from nice to trash mouth to nice in just one tweet.
3 hours ago: “The woman next to me @ the dentist’s is filling her medical form out loud so we can all be very impressed with her wide range of problems”
That totally sounds like the beginning of an IASIP episode.
Okay, let’s rate Kaitlin’s tweets. Normally, I’d have to give her a 5 for Mustness, but I’m awarding a bonus off 3 for continuing to tweet during pregnancy, so that’s an 8. Style is an 8 and Insanity, I’ll have to go with a 9. That’s an overall score of 8.3. C’mon. You gotta follow Kaitlin.
And if you have a suggestion for Twitter in Focus, email us here.
Hey Bros!
Big announcement! Our comics are now available on Comicfleamarket.com. You can order, both the print and digital download versions of Japanese Schoolgirls in Love and The Super Frat/Dick Masterson Special! And not only that, you also get 10% all Comicfleamarket.com purchases with this special promo code!
The code is good until the end of the year, so stop by Comicfleamarket.com and take advantage!
I have a confession to make, I have never liked jugglers. This is probably because back in college I was doing an open mic night and the act right after me was a juggler comedian. I had this bit where I broke glass bottles all over the stage and he demanded that I go back on stage to clean it up. Such nerve! How was I supposed to know he was going to juggle barefoot? Wear some shoes “juggy”. Anyhow, many years later after a particularly tough week, I found myself pitching jokes to another juggler/comedian to see if I could make quick cash. He rejected them. So fuck jugglers. Here now are my rejected juggling jokes.
Juggler Jokes
written by Tony DiGerolamo
copyright 2008
I hate juggling. My dad was a juggler, but I didn’t hate him. I just hated the way he’d pass me the salt at the dinner table. Somehow I’d end up with two extra condiments I didn’t need.
My dad wasn’t much into sports. He liked bowling, but for the wrong reasons. After every strike, he’d yell at the TV, “Dammit! I could’ve caught that.”
He was good at some things. Our games of catch would last seven hours…or until I dropped one of the chain saws.
I was a sloppy kid growing up. Never cleaned my room. When my mom came in and yelled at me, I’d just start picking up the stuff in my room (juggle various items) and then wait until she’d leave (drop items).
Jugglers don’t make a lot of money. I was once so broke, I ate the eggs I was going to juggle in my act. I had to juggle with whatever was left in my refrigerator. I ended up juggling with a jar of mustard, a moldy onion and my cat’s ear medicine.
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